This is a repost from Instagram, for the few of you who aren’t there, about my experience with ketamine for depression.
I’ve alluded here to an effective depression treatment I’ve been trying—and I’ve tried a lot. As usual, I’m sharing this just in case it helps one person. After telling my doctor that it’s been years since I felt any joy and my old levels of productivity, she suggested ketamine treatment.
A lot of you probably know it as a club drug from the 90s, but the studies showing the efficacy of ketamine for depression are staggering, and I was desperate enough to feel normal that I gave it a try.
I’m seven infusions in out of eight, and I feel more like myself than I have in years. It’s allowing me to be productive without the chatter in my mind telling me I suck at my work, feel joy at this amazing place I moved to and to really absorb what I’m talking about in therapy.
I’m almost done with treatment, so I don’t know how it will work for me long-term, but my results between infusions have been so good so far that I’m really hopeful and booster infusions are available if I need them.
I’m documenting the whole process privately right now to process it before sharing more about the journey publicly, ultimately, so let me know if you have any questions. If you’re looking into it, I’ll admit that it’s not cheap, and I’m lucky to be able to try it. One of my friends is about to try it for her own treatment-resistant depression, so it’s already worth it to me to share. I know it’s a little controversial, so please be gentle in your comments.
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So glad to hear that you found something that seems to be working. My husband's friend is microdosing with magic mushrooms (there must be a scientific name for that) for his treatment-resistant depression (he has struggled for years and years) and says that he feels like a new person. I understand the need to control these substances, but I wish our country would be more open to studying these types of treatments. There are so so many people suffering and it's crazy to think there are possible treatments out there that we can't use. There was a great article earlier this year in the Atlantic about psychedelic meds for mental health treatment: https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2019/03/psychedelic-microdosing-depression-anxiety/584119/, and Michael Pollan wrote a book about it. Sending you strength as you work through this!!
Yes! Several people have recommended Michael Pollan's book to me—I def want to read it. And agreed, there has to be some balance between controlling some of these substances and using them medicinally like this. I've heard really good things about microdosing mushrooms too, and I know they're being studied, too.
I'm happy that you found something that works for you! Love reading that you're feeling good. I was listening to Michael Rosenbaum's podcast on my long run last Saturday and he talks a lot about mental health (his mental health, his guests' mental health) and mentioned that the doctor prescribed ketamine for him at this retreat he went to. It really helped him. I too wish the U.S. was more open about different methods to treat mental health. Thanks for sharing your journey with us. <3
Oh! I'll have to listen to that podcast
Yeahhhh! Fingers crossed for long term effects! have you tried EMDR? My cousin is a social worker and can't say enough good things about it!!
I haven't, but I've heard good things. It's so good knowing that there's more out there, though, than just traditional talk therapy and pharmacology.
Yup. Definitely not a one one size fits all of thing!
Great update! I'm hoping they do more research on this for anxiety. Experimenting with meds is awful.
It's more studied in depression, but I have seen in the forums I read people using it for anxiety, too—and I will say I've definitely noticed a decrease in my anxiety since starting. And yes experimenting with meds is just terrible. Hope you find some relief
Thanks for sharing this, it's very hopeful! I'm so happy you're seeing some good effects.
This is an older posting, but I am going back further... In the 1970's I was working on a degree in what is now called, "Pharmacognosy." I was happy with pharmacology, with a minor in botany. A dear friend had developed schizophrenia, and that convinced me that mental disorders were the undeserved areas I wanted to concentrate on. I would find natural substances to repair broken minds. Then doors started slamming shut. My government was happy to send me to a S.E. Asian jungle, not to find plants that heal, but to kill people in a unjustifiable war. The CIA had started project MK Ultra, and wanted an exclusive on drugs with psychotropic effects. The UN Convention on Psychotropic Substances, 1971, made a variety of interesting natural substances into "substances of abuse". Nothing succeeds in the USA, like political grandstanding, and the lies and distortions that go with it. A mother horrified at finding marijuana, in her cheerleader, daughter's possession, gave the politicians a new platform to stand on. That resulted in the "War on Drugs", which is warfare against your own citizens. There was a simultaneous assault on chemistry in general, as being the science of pollution, napalm, and cancer. After over fifty years, that whole situation has been turned on it's head. I would like to think out of compassion, but I have seen little compassion in politics. It is mostly about money. Money to be made selling previously illegal drugs at inflated prices. Money to be saved by governments, finding more efficient ways to alleviate crime, and suffering. My friend died without a cure in that time. I guess i should be happy that we are more enlightened now. I am happy you are now happy once again, and also happy you are getting the word out to others who can benefit. Another quick aside, I remember a professor saying there is two sides to depression. There is the negative side (sadness, fatigue, difficulty concentrating, and feelings of worthlessness) and the positive side (inability to feel: excitement, joy, satisfaction in accomplishments, personal value, bonding). Then he said, "All of the available drugs for depression, only address the negative side. They may help you get out of bed, but they will not help you to like it." He said the reason for that was because the FDA considered "Euphoria" an unacceptable side effect. Their reasoning was, any treatment that brought you joy, would lead to dose escalation and addiction. That is why you, (and most others) have considered their past treatments, mostly a failure.