Full of Love

Photo by Jamie Street on Unsplash

On my yoga retreat, I wrote down that my intention for the year was to be more open-hearted. I was primarily thinking romantically but also being more vulnerable to love all around.

And I am so full of love right now. Honestly, to the point it feels a little weird because my heart has never been this abundantly open before.

As I sat across from my therapist in the sun yesterday, I was filled with love. (OK, hi, also transference.) As my physical therapist sank her fist into my piriformis, I was also still filled with love. (And pain, but I digress.) As I flowed through yoga this morning, I was filled with love. I just want to tell everyone I love them right now?

But there are no coincidences, and I know my mom is behind all of this.

As I was searching my email for something last week, I found an email from her that said “a day without pasta is like a day without sunshine.” (Truth.) Then a comment on a blog post I wrote years ago when I was sick, and she said she’d bring me in soup.

The signs kept coming.

A sign for a wifi password that was “spaghetti.” The next night at Whole Foods, I looked up and saw “Mom’s Chicken Noodle Soup” next to “Nana’s Chicken Soup.” (Nana is what we called my grandma.)

My cousin telling me her mom (my aunt/mom’s sister) had a dream that my mom and nana were together.

Laying in savasana in my favorite deeply soulful yoga class, feeling my mom’s presence all around me and her telling me she was there and she was OK.

I sat shaking in my car, I was so overwhelmed with emotion.

I’m feeling really loved and protected as I’m open-hearted right now.

And, reader, I love you too ❤️

4 comments on “Full of Love

  1. Katie

    Love you, Theodora. One regret I have is not reaching out when you lived on the east coast. I’m in DC and used to make the trip up to NYC regularly. You make a difference.

    1. Theodora Blanchfield Post author

      thank you <3 Telling me I make a difference means a lot—I worry sometimes that my writing is just totally self-serving.

      And I still come back to the east coast every six weeks or so, so maybe we will meet up sometime!

  2. Michelle Z Ginsburg

    You brought a big smile to my face reading your post! This year I am in a new job as a teacher. Back in October I admitted to my principal that every night I fall asleep with a smile in my heart. The work is physically taxing and emotionally draining, but always, always fulfilling. Rarely a day goes by that I do not feel deeply thankful for my job. That will be you sooner than you think!

    1. Theodora Blanchfield Post author

      Another comment that was exactly what I needed to hear! I was just thinking this morning of what a long road I’ve gotten myself into. I’m really excited and anxious to start seeing clients but obviously this work now is what will prepare me for that 🙂

      I’m so glad you have a job you love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That makes such a huge difference in life.


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